Work Friendships: Letting Go and Moving On
I wrote the first paragraphs of this piece months ago when my work friends told me they had either resigned or got sacked, of course in my head and on my editor but I never got around to publishing. I moved on, and when another person tells me he/she is leaving, I slip back into this mood.
Imagine everything going on fine, you throw jokes around, argue at lunchtime, tease one another across the room, talk about your life plans, discuss a tweet from Twitter or an intriguing LinkedIn post, and in a minute it’s all gone, faded into the thin air because of a decision.
Nobody ever told us there would be something called losing friendships at work. One would have thought your friends and classmates dropping out of secondary school and tertiary institutions should have prepared but sadly it did not because this time around you are aware of what is happening around you and the impact it would have on you. It even further pushes you to question all that you hold onto, you start wondering if it was worth it and if you are sane enough to continue where you are.
I wish I knew that as much as you try to keep your relationship with your colleagues official, you unconsciously build a bond from working together and seeing each other every workday of the week as the case may be.
My first experience with my friends leaving my workplace had me close to tears. Of course, nobody will stay forever in an organization but I wasn’t expecting them to leave so soon. I had looked forward to working and enjoying the environment with these ones, but they are leaving. I moved on, but still kept in touch with them, and of course, I tried to find out why they left just to have a perspective of the organization.
The second experience was when my partner chatted to me that she was leaving, as usual, I was close to tears because I wasn’t expecting her to leave so soon too. Then the third notification, I literally screamed on the road because I was shocked, they were all months apart from one another but that didn’t help.
Then came the one that almost got me into a roadside accident because I was on the road on my way home when my friend chatted me up and told me he was asked to leave. That reminds me, I’m sure you don’t know the impact of your news on your loved ones, but try and ensure they are in a good place whenever you want to share the news with them either good or bad.
I also moved on from that, then came the one that moved me to tears. This one was like an elder brother to me, of course, he was older than me and has a family. He was offering me, counsel, after he confirmed he was leaving and I was swimming in tears unknown to him. He told me, “Christie, be sensitive to Spiritual instructions, understand spiritual times and seasons and act on them. When the Lord asks you to move or tells you to move, do not hesitate to move as instructed.
It hurts though, but I will be fine. I’ve barely spent about one year on the job, and I know the deeper I go, the more intense the heartbreak will be either when I want to leave or whenever my colleagues decide to leave.
A few months after!
It’s been 18 months since I started out on this job, and I can tell you that the cycle continues.
I hate goodbyes, so I try as much as possible to be emotionally unattached but the more I try the deeper I become emotionally attached. Don’t blame me, I just hate having to deal with heartbreak every now and then.
Disclaimer: I strongly advise that you do not outrightly get into a work environment to make friends, however, if it comes your way apply wisdom as people are first loyal to themselves most especially in a work environment.
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